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The Rich Tapestry of Life Page
Odds and ends that don’t fit anywhere else, information, general knowledge, light-hearted quips and quotes from all over the place that make up the ‘rich tapestry of life’ for reading in those odd moments when you have nothing else to do!  On this page,this time, we ventured out with a collection about relationships.  Realising this can be a touchy area we hope we’ve stumbled across some odds and ends to provoke thought. Enjoy.  PS. We’ve added some cartoons to lighten the page as well.
This is PAGE TWENTY FIVE - Relationships
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A Unique Experience
No other social relationship duplicates marriage... the motivations, expectations and dynamics of a married couple are different from those of unattached individuals.... the mates are peers from the beginning who are initially unrelated and who typically develop a deeper intimacy as the relationship progresses.... differences in terms of what is expected from a marital partner and a marital relationship and what is expected of a partner to whom one is not married may be marked and extensive
(Martial Therapy by William C. Nichols)

A Confusing Age
In the third season premiere..... ending the episode with both Leonard and Penny in Penny's bed Initially, Leonard and Penny felt uncomfortable with their new relationship, and they agreed to remain only friends, but were unable to maintain this resolution, and remained a couple. Their relationship soured, however, when Leonard told Penny he loved her for the first time, and an unsure Penny simply replied, "Thank you." ..... this eventually caused Penny to break up with Leonard for a second time.
(Wikipedia on TV series ‘The Big Bang Theory’)

Questions Galore
“In her book ‘Unhooked’, Washington Post journalist Laura Session argues that more and more people are replacing relationships with casual sexual encounters. ‘.....love is being put on hold or seen as impossible (and) sex is becoming  the primary currency of social interaction.... Ken Livingstone, when mayor of London, could claim that the fact he had five children by three women was of no relevance to his public career.' And yet, in the same week, one of the country's most senior judges warned that family breakdown had reached catastrophic levels, that the courts are overstretched to the point of collapse as a result, and that 'almost of society’s social ills can be traced back to the collapse in family stability.  Which view is correct? Do 'private' actions have 'public' conse­quences, or not?
(Just Sex by Guy Brandon)
We’re Different
“Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus is a manual for loving relationships in the 1990s. It reveals how men and women differ in all areas of their lives. Not only do men and women com­municate differently but they think, feel, perceive, react, respond, love, need, and appreciate differently. They almost seem to be from different planets, speaking different languages and needing different nourishment.  This expanded understanding of our differences helps resolve much of the frustration in dealing with and trying to understand the opposite sex. Misunderstandings can then be quickly dissipated or avoided. Incorrect expectations are easily corrected. When you remember that your partner is as different from you as someone from another planet, you can relax and cooperate with the differ­ences instead of resisting or trying to change them.”
(From the Introduction of the much acclaimed ‘Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus’ by John Gray)

Compromise
“Certainly every relationship requires making adjustments, compromises, and sacrifices, but we do not have to give up our­selves. Instead, we can arrive at a reasonable and fair compromise. Life is not about having everything our own way whenever we want it. We experience the opening of our hearts when we share.
When a plane takes off and flies on automatic pilot, it will ar­rive at its destination. Though the course seems perfect, it is not. At every point on its route, a plane's course varies due to changing wind speeds and plane resistance. It is never perfectly on target, but it is generally moving in the right direction. A plane on auto­matic pilot constantly makes small adjustments to correct the direction.
Relationships are the same way. No one is ever perfect, but your partner can be the perfect person for you. If we continue to correct and adjust ourselves, we can create a lifetime of love. When we can own our mistakes and adjust our actions, we can reduce the tension in our relationships. (From the Introduction of the follow up book ‘Why Mars & Venus Collide’ by John Gray)

Goals
“True relationship with others involves humility of attitude, refusal to treat others as things or slaves, refusal to pass judgment upon them, acceptance of their limitations and culpability, readiness to welcome and to listen to what they have to say, respect for their uniqueness, progressive understanding of their mystery, trust in what they can become….”
(Emile Rideau, in Journey for a Soul)
What is love?
"I am convinced that most of us have a desire to be better lovers. We want not only to care for others but also to love authentically in all our interactions. We feel good about ourselves when we expend energy to help others; it seems right and noble. We feel bad when we reflect upon our selfish actions.
The meaning of the word love is often confusing because the word is used in so many different ways. Every day we hear people say things like, "I love the beach. I love the mountains. I love New York. I love my dog. I love my new car. I love my mother." On a romantic evening, they will say, "I love you." People even talk about "falling in love." Imagine that! I sometimes want to ask, "How far do you fall, and what does it feel like when you hit the ground?"
Love is not an emotion that comes over us or an elusive goal de­pendent on the actions of others. Authentic love is something within our capabilities, originating in our attitudes and culminating in our ac­tions. If we think of love as a feeling, we shall be frustrated when we can't always work up that feeling. When we realize love is primarily an action, we are ready to use the tools we have to love better.
(Gary Chapman in ‘Love as a Way of Life)

Quick Quotes

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." - Sam Keen

"It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you love them." - Agatha Christie

"Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker." - Author Unknown

"Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own." - Robert Heinlein

"No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying." - unknown


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